Thursday, May 26, 2005

I just don't know.

what do I do? what do I do? what do I do? what do I do?

(welcome to my inner monologue)

I did not sign up for this.

8:00 pm I get a phone call.

"Hey Linds, are you free? can you watch Taylor tonight for a little bit? I just found out about an AA meeting, and I think I should go."

"OK, no prob, I will be right over." (Cancel Dairy Queen plans with Danielle, head over to hang with Taylor. this is what I came up here for, after all.)

2 hours later, she's home. And she's a mess. Her eyes are red and watery, her face pink and puffy. I ask her how the meeting was.
"Shitty", was the only answer I got.

As I leaned in to hug her goonight, I was confronted with the sickly stench of alcohol, slightly masked beneath a thin layer of cigarette smoke. And it hit me like a ton of bricks: this is going to be a long month. And I really don't know where to go from here.

2 comments:

ms. tea said...

does taylor have a social worker (besides you)? she might need someone who knows what kind of resources and outlets are available to her, like support groups or group therapy or something? i dont know, i dont know alot about the situation but it sounds like she's at risk.

lindsay anne said...

no, there is no social worker involved because she's not had a past history of doing anything stupid (as far as her kid is concerned)

but, she did get back on the waiting list for rehab today, Praise the Lord. so hopefully I won't have to deal with many more nights like last night.